Last night we hit a new high! My mind and body is really in tune with who and where i am. I feel the best about me i have felt in my life! My understanding and acceptance of my place is overwhelming. All day yesterday all i could think about was getting home and us being close. The anticipation is murder! I really did not expect to get unlocked but was happy she wanted too. I have really learned to be close while locked up. Before it was hard for me to do that. My mind and body was not in tune with my place. Now i can be really close and be locked up and not feel like i am going to pull my hair out. All this takes time and alot of training. It also takes alot of self examination as to what i am and what my purpose is. I am a chaste male that belongs to my partner. I love her more than anything. All good feelings i have come from her. She loves me and allows me to be hers! She knows i am hyper excited for her all the time and is comfortable with that. We both know that i have no need to ejaculate. So the fact that sometimes i may want to for a brief moment i know that it is not who i am. Nor can i be what we need when i am not focused. In our begining i think she felt i was getting cheated by me not cumming. Now we know i would be getting cheated if i did. After she finished with me she said that after i was up i could lock up and give her back the keys. There is no need to restain me to get back in. She simply tells me. For most of my life i was excessive. Drinking, smoking and sex but most of the sex was self gratification. Now i do not drink at all, smoke at all or cum at all. We have the most amazing sex i have ever had for long periods of time. Quickies are gone! When we have sex, intercourse, which is often, it is amazing. And i last longer than ever. I have no anxiety about my peformance for my mind and body know that i will not be cumming! FREE!!!!!
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Cookie Cutter Chastity
The excitment of starting the journey and the distractions along the way! Most men that have had deep desires for male submission and chastity have been working on the feelings for a very long time. In secret! That is a huge reason they look at porn of male submission. Not really relating to the dominatrix as depicted on screen but with the feelings they long for that this image can provide. The brain says that image produces happy, safe and good feelings. Society says something totaly different about them so they must keep it on the down low. It doesn't take long for them to realise that the woman on that screen is not the one he needs to submit to. It is the one he loves that he needs to submit to and almost always his wife or girlfriend.
His partner has no clue! He may have dropped hints or tried to throw it in a conversation but usually not straight out. Depending on her reaction he has set the tone for how they move forward. Maybe he said something in jest and she made light of it. A powerful negative for him! She had no clue, not fair but this happens all the time. Male submission and chastity is a very hard topic to approach for most couples. If they are not close and in love in may not happen. It is very scary for both the male and female partner. Can he come clean with how he feels without being persecuted and thought less of? Will she be repulsed and leave? While he is in the closet with the whole idea he is still hopeful and in the game of chance. If he brings it up and she is put off will she simply say no and all hope is lost? There are a lot of men that try to bring male chastity into a rocky relationship. Tough sell!
All this brings me to the cookie cutter chastity statement. There are alot of books and literature out there that are great helps and mind broadening material! I am a dedicated follower of some. I truly enjoy their perspective. Their are most defiantly patterns to behavior and people that have been around male submission and chastity can vouch for that. The problem with most couples starting cookie cutter chastity is that the read or hear something and think they have to do everything they read or see in order for their relationship to blossom. And on some time schedule. This is truly a journey. And similar to taking a road trip, if you do not like to travel in a car and you are on edge and constantly cant wait to get there you probably wont enjoy the trip. If you look at it as a learning bonding event where you see new sites, stop and smell the roses the whole event is transformed into something totally different. Same distance same destination.
Couples need to feel safe and understand that their success or failure is based on their expectations of the journey and destination. Some women are more aggressive and some less. Some see benefits in the beginning and some learn it over time. Some don't see it up front and never will! A huge setup for failure is for couple to just fall into this type of dynamic that means so much to a submissive male and think if they just do what everyone else says it will work for them. What part of any ones relationship works that way? There is give and take, negotiation, success, failure, disappointment and trials. Couples that have been practicing male chastity and female led relationships and are successful and fulfilled have all these. LIFE!
For all these reasons i have realised that the need for couples to counsel or coach with someone in this will probably determine their degree of success or failure. Books are not interactive. They are great but they have no soul. They have no feelings and they cannot recognize where you are at the moment and provide the needed support to work through today.
Cookie cutter chastity makes for frustration, when your frustrated you act out, when you act out you cause distance in your relationship.......don't cause distance in your relation! Get male chastity life coaching!
His partner has no clue! He may have dropped hints or tried to throw it in a conversation but usually not straight out. Depending on her reaction he has set the tone for how they move forward. Maybe he said something in jest and she made light of it. A powerful negative for him! She had no clue, not fair but this happens all the time. Male submission and chastity is a very hard topic to approach for most couples. If they are not close and in love in may not happen. It is very scary for both the male and female partner. Can he come clean with how he feels without being persecuted and thought less of? Will she be repulsed and leave? While he is in the closet with the whole idea he is still hopeful and in the game of chance. If he brings it up and she is put off will she simply say no and all hope is lost? There are a lot of men that try to bring male chastity into a rocky relationship. Tough sell!
All this brings me to the cookie cutter chastity statement. There are alot of books and literature out there that are great helps and mind broadening material! I am a dedicated follower of some. I truly enjoy their perspective. Their are most defiantly patterns to behavior and people that have been around male submission and chastity can vouch for that. The problem with most couples starting cookie cutter chastity is that the read or hear something and think they have to do everything they read or see in order for their relationship to blossom. And on some time schedule. This is truly a journey. And similar to taking a road trip, if you do not like to travel in a car and you are on edge and constantly cant wait to get there you probably wont enjoy the trip. If you look at it as a learning bonding event where you see new sites, stop and smell the roses the whole event is transformed into something totally different. Same distance same destination.
Couples need to feel safe and understand that their success or failure is based on their expectations of the journey and destination. Some women are more aggressive and some less. Some see benefits in the beginning and some learn it over time. Some don't see it up front and never will! A huge setup for failure is for couple to just fall into this type of dynamic that means so much to a submissive male and think if they just do what everyone else says it will work for them. What part of any ones relationship works that way? There is give and take, negotiation, success, failure, disappointment and trials. Couples that have been practicing male chastity and female led relationships and are successful and fulfilled have all these. LIFE!
For all these reasons i have realised that the need for couples to counsel or coach with someone in this will probably determine their degree of success or failure. Books are not interactive. They are great but they have no soul. They have no feelings and they cannot recognize where you are at the moment and provide the needed support to work through today.
Cookie cutter chastity makes for frustration, when your frustrated you act out, when you act out you cause distance in your relationship.......don't cause distance in your relation! Get male chastity life coaching!
Monday, June 25, 2012
Time For FUN
This weekend was great! I got unlocked two days in a row and we played for hours! We had the most incredible sex! That was the first time i was unlocked in two weeks. She really has me trained to be her boy toy now. She rode me for a long time and no sign of cumming! It was amazing and felt great the whole time. Twice i had orgasms without ejaculation. They were very powerful and long lasting. The amazing part is that i never lost my erection and the feelings continued. After she was finished with me i was locked back up again. There is always this huge anticipation to get unlocked. She often teases me some before she unlocks me and the anticipation is huge. Then when its time to lock back up again it produces kind of a nervous feeling as i don't know when she will unlock me again. There is no schedule just anticipating when it will happen. I have really learned that our closest sexual connection is when i am not allowed to cum. I have learned that the feelings we have are so strong that while i do desire release, that me not cumming provides us both the kinda man she needs. For me as a submissive i have given myself to this position. In my heart i know this is where i belong and while cumming would feel great for a moment in time the over all loss seems to great a risk to take for both of us. I have learned that the mind and body can be trained to respond to its environment. MY environment is one of total bodily submission and our journey together seems to have no productive reason for me to cum. I am expected to lock myself back up and i do. I always get this overwhelming submissive feeling after i close the lock. I have to get close to her because i need to express my feelings. There are some areas where she has not exerted her power over me. Its there and some things i feel comfortable about she is just getting to the point of being open to. She is a product of our society over her life. Mostly dominated by men. Most men not really dominate themselves but angry control freaks rooted in fear. Anyway, I am sure that the journey we are taking is not for everyone. I do know it is for me and her and given that i don't see cumming in my future. It is not worth the price!
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
TIME and PRESSURE
It has been awhile since i have written anything. Haven't felt motivated to write! I think i have been going through some internal turmoil. Trying to sort out my feelings about chastity and our relationship. It seems in the past that all my concern was on how long i was locked up and trying to look at when the time to start the cycle of ejaculation over again. Counting days!....?
We have just passed 90 days with me not ejaculating. While at times it has been a challenge i have learned that there are so many things to experience along this journey that are new and exciting. We do practice oral and penetrative sex regularly. I just do not cum. I know that we have an agreement that chastity has made a huge positive benefit in our relationship and it is here to stay. I do stay locked up 24/7 except for play time. Play time has changed alot! Sex is no longer just sex. It is always exciting and deep. I feel so good when we are close that my mind is learning that being out means extreme closeness and i truly feel my mind has come to a point of telling my body that it has decided to trade cumming for these feelings. My body still screams for release, mostly my balls, but still the extreme desire is there.
Going this 90 days has made me realise that it takes time and pressure to mold ourselves into good submissive men. I knew going in that i felt submissive but now i am submissive. Taking away the ability to touch yourself, to cum at will or for that matter to even have a true erection is powerful! Learning that any and all good feelings come from one source is powerful! At this point i know where my good feelings come from and it feels really good. It is secure and safe. It is proper. I feel like a kid when unlocked and am hard for hours. Learning to pace myself so that i can be a better lover and partner. Knowing that i am not going to cum. That i am going to be so close and have orgasmic feelings over and over. But i will not be cumming. She does not desire it and to be honest i do not either. It undermines the journey we are on. And it is a journey! A great journey! So, do i count days until i cum? NO! I count days it has been as i reflect on our journey, and know in my heart that the way i feel now me cumming would be like an alcoholic taking one drink. I love where i am and how i feel. Am i in control of myself? More than ever. I feel that we have reached a place of loving female authority and on that note i am in less control than ever.
The bad news is i wont be cumming anytime soon!........The good news is that i wont be cumming any time soon!!!!!!!!!!!!
We have just passed 90 days with me not ejaculating. While at times it has been a challenge i have learned that there are so many things to experience along this journey that are new and exciting. We do practice oral and penetrative sex regularly. I just do not cum. I know that we have an agreement that chastity has made a huge positive benefit in our relationship and it is here to stay. I do stay locked up 24/7 except for play time. Play time has changed alot! Sex is no longer just sex. It is always exciting and deep. I feel so good when we are close that my mind is learning that being out means extreme closeness and i truly feel my mind has come to a point of telling my body that it has decided to trade cumming for these feelings. My body still screams for release, mostly my balls, but still the extreme desire is there.
Going this 90 days has made me realise that it takes time and pressure to mold ourselves into good submissive men. I knew going in that i felt submissive but now i am submissive. Taking away the ability to touch yourself, to cum at will or for that matter to even have a true erection is powerful! Learning that any and all good feelings come from one source is powerful! At this point i know where my good feelings come from and it feels really good. It is secure and safe. It is proper. I feel like a kid when unlocked and am hard for hours. Learning to pace myself so that i can be a better lover and partner. Knowing that i am not going to cum. That i am going to be so close and have orgasmic feelings over and over. But i will not be cumming. She does not desire it and to be honest i do not either. It undermines the journey we are on. And it is a journey! A great journey! So, do i count days until i cum? NO! I count days it has been as i reflect on our journey, and know in my heart that the way i feel now me cumming would be like an alcoholic taking one drink. I love where i am and how i feel. Am i in control of myself? More than ever. I feel that we have reached a place of loving female authority and on that note i am in less control than ever.
The bad news is i wont be cumming anytime soon!........The good news is that i wont be cumming any time soon!!!!!!!!!!!!
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